i like my life with a fuller face
sorry anorexia
A person when they first meet me: You like musicals? That’s so cool!
A person, after one month of knowing me: Holy shit I get it you fucking love musicals please fucking leave me aloonnnneeee
A message from actor to audience
I know I’ve seen one of these before but just incase it isn’t clear. Here are the things Actors would like you to know when you see a show, from an actor.
- If you have the option to not bring your baby, don’t bring it. Please please please don’t bring babies. I love small children but they become a disturbance sometimes.
- If one of the actors is your friend, don’t try to get their attention. It won’t work and everyone around you will hate you
- Laugh? Only? When? It’s? Funny? Dont be that person who fake laughs as loud as possible during a serious scene. You aren’t funny
- If you are seeing a musical don’t sing along
- Dont
- Sing
- Along
- I don’t care if you think you’re quiet
- YOU AREN’T
- Dont talk? We can hear you?
- Please, especially if it’s a school production, actually turn off your phone. You may not recieve calls but it can still interfere with the sound system. We’ve had it happen a lot.
- Dont sing along
- If you see an actor during intermission, leave them alone.
- If you see an actor preshow leave them alone
- If an actor clearly messes up, don’t laugh
- Don’t hold back appropriate laughter. If something’s funny, Laugh! We love attention and we get disheartened when nothing happens at a punchline
- Dont sing along
- Dont try to get actors to break character
- Even if you don’t know them, congratulate them after the show
- Finally, have a good time. We feed of the audiences energy
Benefits Of Having Me As A Friend
• I dance and sing along to old Disney channel songs and musicals at 3am
• I randomly quote vines
• I care too much about the people in my life
• I say random funny shit
• I have decent music taste
• I randomly photograph people when they are caught off guard because I think they look pretty
• I’m extremely loyal
• I send cat and dogs gifs when people are sad
• I will hype you up
+ and - of getting into these fandoms
The Book of Mormon: you get absolute bops, but if they get stuck in your head, you can’t sing them out loud.
Dear Evan Hansen: you get incredibly catchy songs, but you can’t listen to any of them in public without crying.
Falsettos: you get oddly beautiful lyrics, but also get an inappropriate urge to sing whenever you hear the word “hepatitis.”
Hamilton: you are so ready for American history class, but you can’t remember anything unless you rap it.
Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812: you get a unique and beautifully written show, but when you forget the lyrics, you’re lost forever because nothing rhymes.
Les Misérables: you get a huge selection of likable characters to get emotionally invested in, but they all die in the end.
Newsies: you get a professionally-filmed movie, but now, whenever you open Netflix, you literally can’t watch anything else.
Next to Normal: you get Alice Ripley and Aaron Tveit, but every time someone says their name is Gabriel, you get a terrible urge to respond, “Hi, Dad.”
Rent: you get a masterclass in songwriting and storytelling, but you become physically incapable of hearing the phrase “Who died?” without jumping on a table.
Spring Awakening: you get a high-impact and deeply relevant story, but when adults ask you what it’s about, you have no idea how to explain.
Tuck Everlasting: you get an unforgettable show, but you hit the bottom of the tag within ten minutes.
Waitress: you get to know so many underappreciated actresses, but every time you get attached to a Jenna, she leaves.
My first impression of musicals
Hamilton: wowza I’m crushing on dead assholes
Be More Chill: I, too, struggle with my porno loading, damn
Heathers: I’m sorry, but JD is still better than non-psycho dudes
Dear Evan Hansen: it’s about an anxiety ridden suicidal kid who loves trees? There’s a musical about me??
Bare A Pop Opera: shit, a gay kid in denial trying to be straight? Hecka relatable!
Fun House: this family is even more of a wreck than my own
Great Comet of 1812: suddenly I want to read War and Peace
Book of Mormon: I AM NEVER LISTENING TO THIS AGAIN, I’M SCARRED
Amelie: Phillipa is a queen and I now want to live in Paris
The Wild Party: I’ve never been to a party buT WHAT
Falsettos: Jason is relatable for a 12 year old and Trina is more sane than I am
Next to Normal: GABE, ARE YOU DEAD OR NOT? Also Henry is goals
In The Heights: fuck, my mom was right, I should learn Spanish…
Rent: I’d refuse to pay rent when I move out, but I’d rather not be evicted, so
Spring Awakening: wait, there’s gays?? MY NEW SONS
21 Chump Street: JUSTIN, SWEETIE, NOOO
Phantom of the Opera: is there an adequate way to explain to Christine what ‘STRANGER DANGER’ is?
The Lightning Thief: more accurate than the goddamn movie, love it
Bloody, Bloody, Andrew Jackson: I’m sorry, what about using blood as a metaphor?
Waitress: adultery? How lovely…
American Psycho: I honest to God am unsure if I’m turned on or frightened.
A New Brain: gay with mental illness? They know what I want
gets irrationally angry over the fact that Hugh Jackman, a man who’s almost FIFTY, has better legs than I do